posted @ 17:11...

The next story involves a highway, a windshield, and a live turkey. After that sentence, there's not much to tell at this point, is there? It came out of nowhere and hit with force great enough to crack up the right half of the glass, and put tiny glass pieces on the dash. I think we also came away with a few feathers. Maybe we'll make some darts. Now we just have to figure out how to get it fixed. We just bought necessary baby-related products, we're overdrawn, and we just sent off a rent check. Feel like donating? Try this!

posted @ 17:01...

Haven't posted in a while. Spent about a week in Texas, and had very little access to the web. But I'm back and able to deliver funny stories. First, from the Target store in South Austin: I have a certain habit... Whenever I see someone who, in my eyes, bears resemblance to any other person on earth, I turn to my wife and say, "Look, there's (Bill Gates, Big Bird, Charlie Daniels, Santa Claus, or whomever the individual happens to look like)." And so it was the other day as we walked toward the front door of Target. I saw a man get out of a black SUV... I turned to my wife and said, "There's Texas governor Rick Perry!" Turns out, it was Rick Perry... and worse, I think he heard me, because he gave me the weirdest look, as if to say, "Of course I'm Rick Perry, you moron." I just didn't picture the governor of Texas to just show up at Target and do some shopping. I'm impressed that it wasn't the Walmart across the street... but then, maybe that was his next stop.

posted @ 12:45...

Sorry about this, but the only people who will understand the significance of this will be Army people, and those familiar with certain aspects of Army leadership.

Methods by which an NCOIC might fill out your monthly counseling statement, that makes you question his sanity:
a) Includes the term "Shload" and refers to the "Good Ship Lollypop" at some point in the counseling.
b) Writes entire counseling statement as a Dr. Seuss poem.

posted @ 15:49...

Boot shining techniques are as vast and varied as snowflakes and fingerprints.

Added 11 June 2004: NOTE: Since I originally posted this entry in April 2004, I've received a ton of visits on my blog by people were typing "boot shining" into a search engine. Therefore, I figured I'd at least tell you my technique. Hooah?

First, swipe a dry cotton ball in the Kiwi/Lincoln wax. Rub it on the boot in small circular motions. Be patient. It takes a while. When you feel like there's starting to be a little bit of a shine on the surface of the boot, lightly mist some water from a spray bottle onto the boot. Then keep doing what you were doing with the cotton ball. Also, don't switch out cotton balls if you can help it. It's best to use the same one.

So anyway, there's my technique. If you try it, I hope it works for you. I'm wearing those desert tan ones for a year, so no shining for me! Please email me and let me know how my technique works for you.

posted @ 06:24...

Hmmm, it's April. And with April comes sunshine & flowers, right? Nope, not around here. This is Northern New York. It is now 12 degrees, after reaching a glorious high of 65 last weekend. Ah, but now that it's officially Spring, the temperature has dropped again. This place makes no sense.

On to other stream of consciousness thoughts... I miss my wife. It's not that I miss her cooking necessarily, although that's one of her many strengths. She's also carrying my child. One thing I've learned is that when a woman is carrying your offspring, it makes you love them even more. The weight of this hasn't really hit me until now. I can't figure out what it was, but something about this weekend has made me miss her even more.

On to the next topic in my head... I should start a list of great albums for road trips. This list would include any Vigilantes of Love album, but specifically the "best of" album V.O.L. (1996). There's just some great rootsy Americana-sounding music on there. Bill Mallonee's stuff since then is just as good... Being outta the music loop for several years has made me fairly ignorant to a lot of my once-favorite bands. So, Brian's Favorite Road Trip Music List, installment one, includes the above-mentioned album. More to follow...